History pick-up lines

r169_457x256_3404_Cersei_Seated_2d_fantasy_girl_woman_sexy_portrait_queen_picture_image_digital_artYou know…there’s a reason they say I started the Era of Good Feelings… 

Baby you turn my bronze into iron!

Don’t worry dear, my missile is never in crisis.

Madam, it is imperative that you recognize my natural right to pursue your happiness.

If I was a knight, would you lower your drawbridge for me?

I’m sorry i wasn’t part of your past, want me to make it up by being in your future?

My dear…Your beauty could launch a thousand ships.

Baby you’re hotter than Rome under Nero.

Care to come over for some Hysteria Relief?

Hey baby, would you like me to be your Secretary of the Interior…?

You remind me of  Russia in 1917, I’m starting to feel a huge uprising in my lower class.

Hey baby, care to allow me an expedition to prove that you aren’t flat?

Nice pyramids…

I’m like George Washington — I cannot tell a lie. So believe me when I say you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met.

No one can debunk the fact that you are the center of my universe…

 Want to go back to my place and discuss Big Stick Diplomacy? 

You are the Renaissance to my Dark Ages, you light up my world.

I’m like the Vietnam War – way longer than you thought I’d be.

Baby you could even make the Cold War hot!

I wouldn’t need the Emancipation Proclamation if i were your slave baby!

I bet if Jefferson had met you, he would have vetoed the Non-Intercourse Act.

You remind me of the guillotine, i always lose my head around you dear.

Baby, you are hotter than the Great Fire of London.

Not even the Berlin Wall could keep me from you my dear.

Did you have anything to do with The Manhattan Project? Because you’re the bomb!

Baby, I’d annex your territory any day!

Let me know if you need any help getting out of that corset.

Want to reenact the Battle of the Bulge? 

Babe… your love is like a dictatorship…it has absolute power over my heart!

Wow, how astonishing! You must be the eighth wonder of the world! 

I wish to colonize your heart my dear.

Good afternoon sir is that an telescope in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

Are you a historical landmark? Because Eiffel for you.

Want to play War of 1812? I’ll light your White House on fire… 

Your palace looks like it could use a sturdy column.

I’d go to the moon and back for you baby!

You wanna play Pearl Harbor? It’s a game where I lay back and you blow the hell out of me.

I’ve got the ‘thanks’ ready, if you’ll do the ‘giving…

If I could change the alphabet, I would put ‘V’ and ‘I’ together.

My heart burns like a witch for you.

Your breasts remind me of Mount Rushmore….my face should be among them.

Unlike the stock market, I never crash at my peak.

Hey baby, I got the sword you got the sheath, how about a truce?



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About tehcip

I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific.

One response to “History pick-up lines”

  1. Lauren A. Horn says :

    Make him miss you sometimes. When a man always know where you are, and you’re always readily available to him—he takes it for granted.

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