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Top 15 chemistry jokes

I collected all these bad chemistry jokes because all the good ones Argon.

Two atoms are walking down the street.

One atom says, “Hey! I think I lost an electron!”

The other replies, “Are you sure??”

“Yes, I’m positive!”


Why did the white bear dissolve in water?   Because it was polar.


Why are chemists great for solving problems?   They have all the solutions.


What’s the difference between Chemistry and cooking?  In Chemistry, you should never lick the spoon.


Anyone know any jokes about sodium? 


Two chemists go into a restaurant. 

The first one says “I think I’ll have an H2O.” 

The second one says “I think I’ll have an H2O too” — and he died.


A neutron walks into a restaurant and orders a couple of cokes. As she is about to leave, she asks the waiter how much she owes.  The waiter replies, “For you, No Charge!!!”


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Dave Chappelle – HBO Comedy Half Hour


(You MUST read them out loud or it doesn’t make as much sense)…

1) Thats not right…….. Sum Ting Wong

2) Are you harboring a fugitive………………. Hu Yu Hai Ding

3) See me ASAP…………. Kum Hia Nao

4) Stupid Man…………………. Dum Fuk

5) Small horse… Tai Ni Po Ni

6) Did you go to the beach?… Wai Yu So Tan

7) I bumped in to a coffee table… Ai Bang Mai Fa Kin Ni

8 ) I think you need a face lift… Chin Tu Fat

9) It’s very dark in here… Wao So Dim

10) I thought you were on a diet… Wai Yu Mun Ching

11) This is a tow away zone… No Pah King

12) staying out of sight… Lei Ying Lo

13) He’s cleaning his automobile… Wa Shing Ka

14) Your body odor is offensive… Yu Stin Ki Pu

15) Great… Fa Kin Su Pah

Have fun!